Loss of a Dream

Hello! I hope you guys will indulge me on this post. I have a heavy heart right now. I am mourning the loss of a dream. I know it could be so much worse and others are mourning the loss of loved ones, and I am so sorry for your loss. But I want to discuss the loss of a dream/expectation/how you imagined it would be. Those loses hurt also. You have a vision in your head of how it will be, what it will be like. Maybe it is a marriage with the current boyfriend. Maybe it’s the college you always dreamed off. Maybe it’s the life you would have when you were forty. However, in a moment that can be lost. What do you do with that? If it is something you have had in your heart or head for a long time, it is hard to let go.

I know I am struggling with letting go of the way I imagined something. Circumstances change and that dream you had has to be let go. Man do I scream NO! I want what I want. The reality is it will never be the way I saw it being. It is all changed, never to go back to how it was. I am processing those emotions. I want to cry, scream, yell, throw a fit, and grieve. I AM grieving. I think it is okay to let myself grieve but eventually I have to move on. I don’t want to stay in this place emotionally. I can’t. And I have the power to move on. I am not waiting on someone to change the situation back to the way it was. I have to accept it will never be that way again and the dream I had was based on different information than the new reality. Yes that still sucks! I can easily see the way I wanted it to be and cannot imagine the way it will be now. Slowly I will have to accept the new way. The old is gone. The new can be good also. I am sure in a year or two I will look back and say it was okay. This is good also. But in my current state, I am not sure how that will be. I am going to give myself time to grieve and then I am going to actively work on accepting. There truly is nothing else I can do. And when something is your dream and not someone else’s, you have to allow them their dream. I don’t know why the circumstances have changed but they have. I must work through my anger/hurt and learn to accept. I will not dwell on the past. Is there something you need to accept and allow the dream to be in the past? Remember you can do nothing to change the past or the future, all you can do is be in the present.